Grace, Too

Alternate title: Happy Birthday Darling.

I know I'm a couple of days early, it's not quite the 24th. And I'm obviously a little too obsessed with the Tragically Hip (it's a good song, they all are).

Besides the Tiffany's bag you got on my birthday, the only other thing I'm good at is writing you a love song. And by a love song I mean a blog, that's my version of it. : )

I've recently entered into enemy territory so I'm not using real names anymore. Plus my dad* (*may or may not be his real name) told me that if I go ahead down this path, there's a really good chance K and M (for all their dabbling outside the lines) will just cut me off too. At this point, I don't doubt that there's anyone out there who won't walk away from me. I'm used to it. I never know what M's gonna do. I love her, but she's a wildcard. K though, we've been together since she was a baby. Since we were both babies I guess because in light of her recent birthday, we have both decided to stay 27 forever and now I guess we'll always be the same age.

What can I say about the oldest friend I have for her birthday? We've both gone through our crazy, self-destructive stages, dealing with what we had to deal with. Her, when she was supposed to, in her teenage years. Me, I suppressed it and lived my crazy 20s in the past two years of my thirties. (I mean 27.) And we've switched places. I was always the older, mature, stable one who she could come to when she needed to. I can't imagine it's easy to deal with things turning completely upside down, and now I'm the one she worries about instead of it being the other way around.

She got married to the greatest guy, is following her passions, as am I, but with a family, a marriage, some real security in life. Although I think we both have almost healed, she's a better person than I am because she would never give in to occasional relapse of anger. She is grace personified, no matter what her parents throw at her. I do ok for awhile, and then I always give in, give up, and walk away, to protect myself.

And she's the most beautiful girl I've ever seen. Despite our extreme differences, we are kindred spirits and as she turns 27 (again) like I have so many times, I wish her the best year ever. Even though the past few years must have have been pretty awesome.

I'm sure we'll go years and years into the future together, calling each other on Fridays, her listening to my stupid dates while I stand and cheer at her accomplishments in life. And that's what real family does, even if they're not your real family. They love you, they support you. Every once in awhile, the pedulum swings and you take opposite roles. Sometimes the supporter, sometimes the one who cries. The beauty lies in unconditional love, full support and no judgment. And the occasional classic fight, the occasional perfect gift, the occasional Taylor Swift concert in the rain and coming home together to your home away from home in the middle of the night. The occasional shared bottle of red wine. The constant love and support and conversation.

How did we get here? By never drifting too far apart. I love you kiddo. Happy Birthday!!