Call me maybe??

(That is the opposite of the message I'm sending out tonight.)

Text message: Hey! Did I pass you on the street yesterday? 

Me: I'm not sure. I have absolutely no idea who this is.

Him: It's Kevin.

Hmmm, "Kevin".

Me: You'll have to give me a bit more to go on dude.

Turns out I did know him and he described what I was wearing yesterday so I did walk past him.

The question remains: Why did he still have my number? We went out maybe twice about a year ago. 

This happens ALL the time. Some random guy sends you a text and you don't know who they are and it turns out they are someone you went on one or two dates with a year and a half ago. They say women are the ones who hang on, and maybe that's true when we're really in love. But you buy us dinner once and neither of us feel the need to try it again? We delete. Men it seems, never ever ever ever do that.

And somehow they think it's perfectly fine to text you out of the blue on a random weekday afternoon when they are thinking about you. Do you guys really think we want to hear from you at that point? 

We don't. We don't care if you saw us on the street or if you moved in to the building next door or if you were at my downstairs bar last night with your buddies. We've completely forgotten you even exist and we were hoping you'd be a gentleman and do the same. We don't want to text you or meet up for a coffee or grab some lunch. We've moved on.

I actually got smart and started keeping a list in the Notes section of my phone called the X-files. Every time I delete a guys number now I write his name and number in there. Then when those random messages pop into my phone I can cross check the number with my data. Because once you ask "who is this?" they somehow seem able to suck you into a conversation you're not even all that keen to have.

I only recently got smart about this so there are dozens of guys I haven't talked to in a year or two walking around with my number in their phone. And someday, I'll hear from them. 

It's funny to see their reaction when they realize you've deleted them from your phone. Some of them seem hurt: "You deleted my number?" He pouts. Some of them get it: "Oh I don't blame you. Guess you deleted my number." (Those ones are pouting on the inside.) 

Not wanting to sound like I have a double standard lets clarify: I'm not talking about ex- boyfriends or someone you meet and really would love to be friends with. Y'all know I LOVE hanging out with my ex's. But those are guys you had a real connection, real friendship, real relationship with. Not some random stranger who bought you a drink once upon a time. Disclaimer: This also does not apply to any of the guys who work at AAA. 

Men of Toronto: it's time to move on. It's really quite easy to meet new people. Clean out your contacts. There's this great little thing called "delete contact". 

And while you're at it, please stop reading my blog and viewing my LinkedIn profile. That's just creepy.

Sullivan out.