Freebird

Wanna know a secret? Ok, it's not really a secret. But for most of you who know me now, you didn't know me then. Today is my wedding anniversary. Like that night, before I got married, I can't sleep tonight. (Like I actually sleep, ever.)

I still managed to look pretty in the morning, so I'm hoping that a decade later I can still pull that off (obviously I was a child bride). Interestingly, my recent little side project is finally wrapping up today (thank God). And it ends with a photoshoot in the park, doing the same thing in the same place I was with Travis all those years ago. 

Honestly? I still miss him. He is one of the smartest, most talented, funny people I have ever met. He decided he wanted to learn to play the guitar and instead of starting with the basics, the first song he learned was Freebird. I'm not sure if he was an overachiever or just arrogant (ok family, he was arrogant).

It's ironic actually if you know the lyrics. And I dare you to try to learn the solo. But, I don't really miss the electric guitar sitting in the living room and listening to him trying to learn a new song, playing it over and over and over, making mistakes and starting at the beginning again...in a way though, my life is kind of like that annoying repetition now. 

Trying something new, making a mistake, starting over, trying again, getting a little bit further into it before I mess it up again. But it's ok. Because in the end, Travis didn't give up and he was a rockstar at playing Freebird. And I'll get there with life, if I don't give up either. 

I can't help but wonder if he plays it for his new wife? And I can't stop the series of events I've put into motion over the past 2 months. My dad, always the voice of reason, cautioned me about doing this. And I listened to him and thought about it, I did. But at the end of the day, life, fate, the Universe, whatever you want to call it is pulling me in this direction and I had to go along with it. And I have a pretty new blue dress, so it's going to be alright.

Cat is on my lap and she's yawning, so I'm going to stop listening to Freebird on loop and go back to bed for an hour or so.  See you on the other side of August 9th.