Blackbird on a Wire

"Like a bird on a wire, like a drunk in a midnight choir, I have tried in my way to be free." - Leonard Cohen

I caught up a bit with a friend of mine this morning. After filling her in on the events of the past 6 or 7 weeks (I've lost track) she suggested I write a story called: "My horrible, terrible, very bad summer."

I won't lie to you, because I never do (alright, sometimes I embellish, but no lies) this summer has been a bit of a let down, especially after such a depressing winter. I was hoping things would go a little better. Maybe just not as many trips to the ER, not as many medications for weird medical issues, not so many panic attacks trying to stay calm through all that.

I keep thinking if I could just get to a spot where I feel a bit better, I could use some of this time I have to work on my book. Go to yoga. Sit on the beach. It just hasn't worked out that way. Yet :)

This past weekend a friend I didn't know very well invited me to come up to their cottage. Call me crazy, but I decided to go. Y'all know I'm a PEI girl and I need the fresh air, to sit on the water once in awhile to stay grounded. Bonus points if there's a dog involved (there was). 

So off we went. My girlfriend texts me. 

Her: Any plans for the long weekend? 

Me: Oh yah, I'm on my way to a cottage with some people I don't really know yet. 

Her: Ha ha. 

Then she calls me. 

Her: Where are you?

Me: Somewhere near Bobcaygeon? 

Her: Oh. My. God. You were serious?!!

I was. And I went to a party at a cottage where they actually played Bobcaygeon for me. Twice. I guess I can cross that off my bucket list. 

In my experience, no matter how safe and secure you think you are, everything can change suddenly overnight. I read once that the more factors that make up your identity, the less threatened you are when any one of them goes away. I think that goes for people too. Most people out there? Are good people. And one thing I will say about this summer, is that I've forged some wonderful friendships with old friends and new who have been there for me. Who have visited, brought me groceries, stayed with me in the ER in the middle of the night. Spent a little more time with my brother and sister. 

I've been scared and stressed but I haven't felt alone. Whatever happens with me, I've tried in my own way to be free, to trust, to love again. If there's one good thing you can take out of a "terrible, horrible, very bad summer" it's that you didn't have to go it alone. And I did get to see some beautiful sunsets this past weekend and I made some great new friends. :)