I feel that I need to write something tonight, not let a milestone birthday like this pass like so many others. And it hasn't. I had a night out with my good friends mom, who is now my good friend, we listened to Irish music and singing and dancing and I felt connected to my heritage. I had dinner with friends, my cousin and her boyfriend and my best friend. We had an oscar party and Liz made me my first birthday cake since I was little. With candles and wishes. Then I left work early to see someone I love and had dinner tonight with someone I love too.
Birthdays might be silly but they do remind you of how many people out there care (thank you FaceBook) and with three bouquets of flowers, a bunch if great memories and a heart full of love, I can't remember how I ever felt so alone.
I don't honestly believe that life has been kind to me these past three years. I think I've suffered more than I deserved to, but that's nobody's fault. There are people out there who have endured more than me and never had the love and support (albeit even at a distance) that I've had.
My favorite part of today was a picture I received from my uncles best friend. I've talked about him recently, and the waves his leaving has sent through our lives. But this picture of Brett, with his partners, having a glass of wine for/with me was so fun, so full of love, I immediately made it the wallpaper on my phone and I laugh everytime I see it.
Life is messy. But its also beautiful. If you can find calm, happiness, beauty in the mess, you are doing better than most.
Birthdays are a new beginning. If you read this blog at all, I'm kind of a new beginnings junkie. New years, fall, spring, birthdays...whatever it takes. Tomorrow is always fresh, with no mistakes in it. Here's to tomorrow!
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