Perfectly Imperfect

I know I don't write very much anymore. I haven't had a stellar year. It's been six years since the big disaster and I keep thinking, every year, this one will be better. But they never are.

Right now, my skin is raw and itchy, I'm not processing Donia's death very well. My dog is throwing up, apparently some psycho is putting poison treats in the dog parks around here. My psychic isn't picking up the phone :)

The day Donia died, I went on a date. He was perfect.  But none of us are perfect. It was smoke and mirrors, just an illusion. One we like to believe in and sometimes we need to. I kissed him goodbye and got on the streetcar and kissed her goodbye the same night. I needed to believe in something right then and for that time, it was him.

Life in the real world is very different from cult life. Out here, everything is real. Every choice you make, everyone you let into your life - it matters. What doesn't matter is being perfect. I haven't been through this a lot. But when someone you love dies, the pain is not durable, the healing will take some time. And the new people will have to earn their place.

I don't expect much from the Universe, just bring me good people. As long as they are as perfectly imperfect as me. :)

Sullivan out.