Don't suffer in silence

Alriiight, I'm still talking about Mental Health Week. It's technically not over till the week is...

So at the second event I spoke at this past week, one of the questions they asked to me and the partner from the firm that I was presenting with was: What would you say to someone who is suffering in silence?

My response? DON'T. 

Not everyone is comfortable sharing their story in public. This week was the first time I've done it, and it wasn't easy - to be completely honest and put it lightly. It was fucking hard. 

Now that it's over though, I feel lighter, more liberated. Did I think I'd become some kind of advocate/spokesperson for ex-Jws and mental health issues? No. But life throws you curveballs sometimes. (By the way, those two situations are closely related.)

One thing I've learned over the past, very difficult week is...being honest about these things is what helps you find your community. Your people. Since that magazine article has come out I've had an outpouring of support from the ex-JW community. People I've never met who want to talk, want to meet me. 

Since speaking at these two events this week at work, so many people have come to me and said "We ALL have experienced this in some way." If you think about it, it makes sense. One out of four Canadians experiences mental illness during their life. Count in all the people who love them, their families, friends, co-workers and we are all affected with the same disease. 

A disease which is not always preventable, but it is curable. It's been said that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. And I'm not trying to downplay the seriousness of that, I would never judge anyone who had attempted to take their own life. I've been there myself. 

But in Canada, we are so lucky to have so many resources and so much help available to us. Whether it be meditation guides (easily attainable for free on the internet), physical activity, therapy or even in some cases, medication. If we put in the hard work (and I'm not discounting the fact that it's hard) and take advantage of these things, we can overcome. 

The most important thing in my opinion though, is not suffering in silence. How can anyone help us if we don't tell them we need the help? There's a stigma around it and it could make us feel weak. Which is the last thing you need if you're feeling bad about yourself already. But it's the only way not to feel so alone. 

In my experience, people who are the kind of people you want in your life, will never leave you for disclosing that. Some of the flakes will, but you probably are better off without them. 

One of my girlfriends broke into my apartment the night I tried to kill myself and called an ambulance. Another one, on the anniversary of that night, I walked over to her apartment and asked her to keep all my big, sharp knives for me until I felt better. They are both cherished friends to this day. 

If we're all honest and support each other, what do we really have to be afraid of? We've got each other. 

Well, this was a heavy topic for a sunny Saturday afternoon. I've accidentally frozen a bottle of wine so I'm having a wine slushy for lunch. Then I'm going for dinner and a movie with my oh-so-wonderful adopted family. I'm super happy to have someone to buy Mother's Day flowers for. Your people are out there. You just have to find them. When you do, everything gets better. :)