Oceans

My therapist is not conventional. That's why I love him. I've had a couple of days off work. Apparently I didn't notice I had accumulated 6 and a half weeks of vacation and I'm screwed.

I would like to go home to see my family, they've all been having a bit of a rough time lately. But Linda (the artist formerly known as my mother) is going to be there. So it's a no-go on that one.

I've been struggling a bit with a decision. I actually kinda like this guy. Not a random, an old friend. It's on the table right now. Y'all know I don't date.

So I'm talking to Ross today and he's like you have to decide. Do you try it out and potentially get hurt? Or do you walk away and regret that later? And then he's like walk across the room. Make a decision before you hit the wall.

I've spent the past 6 years building walls and covering them with barbed wire to keep people out. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love the people in my life. I have the best friends I've ever had. But I don't let myself love them too much. Because then I could get hurt. Again.

I didn't need to walk all the way across the room to make a decision. :)

Sometimes I feel like I'm drowning. But the past couple of weeks I felt happy again. I take everything too seriously but I've been told by a very good friend that "perfection is the enemy of the good".

Maybe we can survive the ocean. Maybe I need to let some walls down. I've made a lot of mistakes but I don't think this will be one of them.

Sullivan out.